To Catch a Cheat: 10 Signs of Infidelity

 Instead of asking your partner if they have been unfaithful and hoping they tell you the truth (they likely won’t) stay silent and let their actions confess their sins. 

Here are 10 Signs of Possible Infidelity

Defensive Behavior: Is your partner on the defensive or doing what I call “blame-shifting” every time you ask them about where they have been or try and clarify something that is not adding up?  You only have to play defense against an opposing team and you’re both supposed to be on the same side so why wouldn’t they try to alleviate your fears or explain something to you?

Hiding Technology:  OK, so just because you are in love doesn’t mean you have a right to snoop through their email account but if your mate is keeping their phone with them 24-7 and flips out every time you log onto their laptop without allowing them to delete their history, there’s an issue.  What are they hiding?  It might not be another person but it’s something.

Seperating From You in Public:  Are they less touchy-feely?  Less likely to hold hands or hang out in public? They either don’t want to be caught canoodling with you or are trying to send a message  to the outside world that you aren’t together. This does not apply if they have always been against PDA’s of any kind.

Criticizing You: It is not uncommon for a cheating partner to do all they can to make you the “bad person in the relationship” in order to justify their going outside of it.

Suddenly Very Busy:  Do they have to work late a lot?  Are their business trips popping up?  Are you finding they are hanging out with friends more than they used to?

They Suddenly Care Even More About Their Appearance: Hitting the gym more often?  Dressing better?  You can’t really attract or keep someone new in old sweats.

Pressuring you to do things differently:  Does it seem as though your spouse is comparing you to someone else?  Are they asking you to dress/look/act differently?  Introducing new things into the relationship that seem out-of-character?  Spicing things up is one thing but if your couch potato hubby who hates spicy food is suddenly pressuring you to go out for Latin food and salsa dancing, it’s a red flag.

A Significant Change in Your Sex Life:  Are you finding that your partner’s hands are all over you, that you’re sleeping to his back or that he suddenly has a ton of new moves? 

You find them on a personals site:  Listen to me closely.  No person in a relationship needs to be signed up on Match.com, Adultfriendfinder or any of the other online dating-or whatever else- sites.  They will swear they were “just browsing” but that’s called a phat lie.  Even if they were, (and they weren’t, believe me) since when is that OK?

Your Gut Is on Fire: Honey, you have it for a reason.